Recent Letter to the ElderWisdomCircle™
CAREER: Feeling Trapped Working in Family Business Original Letter Hi Everyone im new to this so i don't really know how this works. My name is Gillroy im 25 years of age, living in Africa, Namibia, Walvis Bay. I left school standard 6 grade 8 and Started working at my dads company Upholstery and Sign making. at the age on 15. (Wish was not Legal) I was too young. So iv been working here for 10 years straight. I stayed by my dad. In this 10 years i studied Graphc Design Computer and safety in the workplace. Im running his signs now for about 6 years now as manger my basic is 7500 Namibian Dollars. Our currentcy has dropped its very low. 1U$ Dollar = about 15 NAD+-. Rent is very expesive i have one child and want my life to move forward. Build a family, I see my Dad moving forward buying properties left and right makes deals his a good bussines man but i feel traped my Dad is married to his new wife and her kids. His married for 10years to his new wife. the point is dont see how i progressed in my life since the day i started to work since the age of 15..but my dad is just movin frward and he does not include or invest in me. i feel i should have been doing good now for my hard work and loyaty. Im a hard worked a Manager Designer and machine operator at our Signs department i have alot of knowlage in the sings indusrty. I feel im getting depresed and tunring into a shell. What new careeR can i do or how do i start over and move forward from this? I dont want to waist more of my time here i see my stepbrother getting everthing he wants when i ask nothing happens. Im kind of stuck and really dont know what to do? how to start over? i dont want to waste more time im getting old. Please help me in any way you can
Elder Response Gillroy, one thing I love about answering these emails is that the authors come from all over the world and from very different cultures. I live in the United States. I have a few ideas to offer you but, of course, I imagine life in your country and your customs may be very different from ours. I have known many people who work in family businesses. And it seems there is always a lot of tension between family members over things. I wonder if it is time for to take your experience and talents to a new company. First, though, have you sat down with your father and discussed this? I know from experience that this can be difficult. But I recommend a calm, unemotional discussion with him about the value you have added to his business. Don't be afraid to discuss a better salary, but I suggest you don't act angry or bring in your stepbrother. That adds a whole other dimension to the discussion. Are there other sign businesses in your town, or elsewhere in Namibia where you might find work? In my opinion, you have done a lot for your father already and you can still be a good son to him even if you work elsewhere. I just read in Wikipedia that Walvis Bay is a fairly large town with lots of businesses. The other thing I would say is that you are still a very young man with a long life ahead of you. I'm sure this situation with your father is very frustrating right now. But it will not last forever. Try to take pride in the good, solid work that you do and think about whether your next step is to move on. And thank you, Gillroy, for giving me the opportunity to learn a little about your country.
Best Regards, Greg |
