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Recent Letter to the ElderWisdomCircle™

DATING/RELATIONSHIP: Constant fighting with bf
Letter #: 389239
Category: Dating/Relationship

Original Letter

I've had a boyfriend for almost a year now , and things were amazing / perfect at the start but recently it's just been constant fighting and he seems to act like he doesn't care but if we break up we just end up getting back together. he is always changing moods quickly and I don't know how to react so I just get upset and tear up and when I tear up it bothers him. he calls me annoying when I haven't done anything he seems to be bothered by everything I do & It really hurts to be an annoyance to someone you love. i don't know how to leave him alone when we break up it hurts I see him everyday and it kills me to not be with him so we just end up getting back together but we just fight again.

Elder Response

It seems to me, you can continue getting annoyed and hurt by your boyfriend, breakup and get back together, and this cycle might go on for a very long time.

Natt, the way I suggest you leave your boyfriend alone after a breakup, is to remind yourself of the fighting and the hurt when the two of you are together. Think about how you want to be treated and how you want to feel when you're with your special someone. 

I understand you want someone in your life. You deserve to be loved and respected. While you think you may love your boyfriend and he may love you, sadly, the two of you may not be compatible, Do you think that could be the situation?

It likely will hurt when you see him every day. Natt, it takes courage and self-respect to gain what you want in life. The hurt will ease up if you give it time. If you want to move on with your life, you need to be strong and determined. Then you can be open to meeting someone with whom you can have a more harmonious relationship.

I wish you good luck and a very happy future, Natt. Feel free to write again if you have another question. 


Best Regards,



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