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Recent Letter to the ElderWisdomCircle™

FRIENDSHIP: How do I move on?
Letter #: 407589
Category: Friendship

Original Letter

I have very strong feelings for a friend I've known for a few years. We had history in the he past (we had a 'thing' and liked each other but never got to date) and we recently started talking again. I have feelings for this person that I've never had for anyone else, I just can't explain it. I get giddy and anxious when I hear their name. Anyways, I told this person I liked them, because I do. And they did not really give an answer as if they did or did not feel the same as me. I just keep getting mixed signals from this person; one minute they seem into me and the next they don't . Should I keep trying? Do they like me or not? Should I move on? You know that feeling when you want something so so so bad and you'd do anything to have it, but it's so out of your reach and you can't do anything about it? That's how I feel. :(

Elder Response

Anna, I'm sorry to hear you are in this confusing situation. Yes, it is hard not knowing how another person feels about you, especially after you took the risk of declaring your own feelings for him or her (you don't specify if it is a boy or a girl).

Your email suggests there are only two options open to you: To move on or to keep trying with this one person. May I suggest a third option? Remain open to this person for the time being. Your friend may be confused about his or her feelings and might be unable to express them at this time. That seems pretty common to me.

So, stay open to your friend, but open to others as well. I don't think you need to write this person off, but perhaps keep your options open. Romance can crop up in surprising ways, I've found.

I hope this is of some help and I wish you the best.

Best Regards,



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