I found my first crush on Instagram — should I get in touch?

Go for it, says our elder. Otherwise you’ll never know.

Dear EWC

In elementary school, I had a huge crush on this guy for three years, to the point where he was probably my first love. We never dated or anything because we were 12 but we had lots of fun when we were little and were good friends for several years. Eventually, he moved away and we didn’t see each other for a long time, but I still thought of him from time to time. Just wondering what he was up to (first loves die hard I guess?). Anyways, we recently found/followed each other on Instagram and I was super excited (I haven’t seen him in like four years)! He was a big part of my childhood and there’s still a fondness there, and I want to reach out to him but I’m not sure how. Should I dm him? Or just let it be? I know he remembers who I am but I don’t know what he’s like at all anymore. Anyways, kind of a stupid dilemma, but he was a part of me growing up and I’ve never really forgotten that. Not sure what to do.

Hedwig replies

What would you do if it were a girlfriend you had been very close with and wanted to reconnect? Don’t seek this as a romance, regard it as a friendship. That way, you can reach out without attaching any strings. Contact him, remind him of your closeness as kids, and say you would love to get together and catch up. You certainly have nothing to lose. My motto is, “Nothing ventured, nothing gained.” Actually, I wanted to find a girlfriend who I had not seen in 50 years and hired a private detective to find her. It was fun, and then we drifted apart again – not much in common. Go for it. Otherwise, you will always wonder.

Letter #: 438262
Category: Friendship