How to keep FaceTime friendships alive when life goes offline? 

Keeping in touch requires commitment, says our elder—no matter where you connect.

Dear EWC:

Hi, I am in the 7th grade but I am doing online school at home. I have met some really great people that go to my school online and we have created a really great friendship and talk to each other every single day. But unfortunately two out of three are leaving and going back to school and I am still staying at home so we have been FaceTiming everyday until they go back to school. I am really sad and worried that our friendship will fall apart when they leave… They promised it wouldn’t but things happen. I don’t know what to do. Should I be worried?

Angela-Rose replies:

I am proud of you for finding and creating great friendships on line during a time when our whole world is trying to figure out how to do life differently, especially attending school at home because of the pandemic. As you are in 7th grade you are beginning to build experiences that will be the foundation for the rest of your life. You are learning from the things you encounter in life now, and the choices you make now. The things you learn will help you be successful and find meaning in challenges you face again later in life.

So what do I mean by that? This same challenge of trying to hold on to important relationships in the midst of things changing now is going to happen often in life and how you handle the situation you are in now will also help you in the future. 

So let’s talk about your situation now. I have three ideas:

Can you ask if your online friends would be willing to FaceTime a certain amount of times during the week that you all agree on to do homework together? 

Or if that does not work, can you set up regular FaceTime just to chat about what is going on with each of you? 

Would you all three be interested in using the House Party app so you can see each other and also play online games together like Uno, Monopoly, Ticket To Ride and those types of things?

These are ways to stay connected through the change that may even strengthen your friendship. They may be just as nervous about going back to school and losing touch with you. I wish you good luck in maintaining these friends. I know you will be able to find things to do that keep you connected even through the upcoming changes if your friends are committed to staying close. 

Please don’t hesitate to reach back out to us to discuss this more. You seem like a very caring person!   

Friendship 

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