My boyfriend’s mom read all our messages and now she wants me to apologize. 

Help! You haven’t done anything wrong, says our elder. Be honest with her and maybe she will understand.

 

Dear EWC

Hello! I’m 17 years old and something super embarrassing happened to me. My boyfriend and I have known each other our entire lives because my dad was friends with his parents and we recently started dating. Well, we haven’t done anything physically sexual yet because I’m a virgin and I’m not ready but we’ve had phone sex and stuff like that. Well, this week his mom took his phone away and she read all our messages and confronted him about it and he was forced to tell the whole truth. I’m so completely embarrassed and he told me his mom wants to talk to me and an apology and for me to say it’ll never happen again. I’ve never done anything like this before and the one time I do, I get caught! I don’t know what to do. I’m so embarrassed to talk to his mom, especially because she and I always got along so well. What if she hates me and what if she won’t let us date after this? Please help me.

 

Ms.Mary replies

I’m so sorry. That is embarrassing! You sound like a nice girl who made a mistake. His mother won’t hate you. She may be disappointed in you and her son for a while, but she will get over it. It does take two to tango – so he is at fault too. The best thing you can do is be honest and tell her the same thing you told me – that you are still a virgin and that you’ve never done anything like this before. Of course, say you are so sorry and that it will never happen again (if that is true). If it isn’t true, you’ll just have to say you are sorry.

If you are brave enough, initiate the conversation first. She may respect that.

You and your boyfriend are almost adults, so once you are both 18, you can do as you please, though you are wise to take it slow.

You didn’t mention whether you sent pictures or just talked dirty. Fingers crossed there weren’t pictures. If there were, then this is a good lesson for you. I’ve read so many letters from girls who sent pictures and ended up regretting it big time. Terrible stories.

You and your boyfriend are at an age where you are experiencing a lot of sexual feelings. That is natural. You can’t stop that. Hopefully, his mother will remember her sexual drive when she was that age. Maybe and maybe not.

Anyway, lesson learned. This, too, shall pass. I hope she will be understanding and forgiving. If you get a chance, please let me know how it goes. Good luck!

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