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Recent Letter to the ElderWisdomCircle™

CHILDREN: Help My Daughter Deal With Questions About Her Birthmark
Letter #: 404906
Category: Children

Original Letter

My 6 years old girl has Strawberry on her cheek (noticeable blood vessel growth on her cheek). Kids asking her what is it and she gets upset and tells them it's not their business. She doesn't have friends at school and I assume it's may be related to her appearance. I wish to receive advice to which tools I can give her of how and what to she can answer the other kids and how not to get upset from them asking her of what is it. Thanks, Natalie

Elder Response

It seems to me, Natalie, that your daughter should simply be honest about her strawberry. When people ask, she should say, "it's a strawberry birthmark." If they ask if it can be taken off or will go away, she can simply say "yes" or "no." Then she can change the subject, which you can teach her to do. She can tell the other person that she has on a pretty dress, or the guy has on a nice shirt, or let's go play, This mark doesn't have to be considered ugly, Natalie. It's simply something different that your daughter has on her body that no one else does. People have different colors of hair, or skin. Some people have moles or warts, scrapes and bruises. Yes, it really isn't polite for other people to ask, I agree. But they will do that, and the easiest thing is just to act as though it's no big deal. We all have to do that at times in our lives, and it's a lesson best for your daughter to learn now.

Perhaps in the future this birthmark can be removed. But if not, learning today how to deal with people in a kind way when they are not kind will help your daughter be a better person all her life. If she is straightforward about this now, Natalie, I think the kids will become her friend because they will find out that they can't make her a victim and so bully her. I hope this works for you.

Best Regards,



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